The first thing that came to my mind when I read this report was the TV show (and book series) Little Bear. Little Bear’s snake friend has the name “No Feet.” I’ve always thought it was a pretty odd name.

After all, Little Bear is named after his species—so are the other characters, from Cat to Owl to Duck to Hen. Why is No-Feet named as such and not “Snake”? Is snake a dirty word or something—and is it not mean to point out his deficiency in the mobility department? Would it be kind, after all, to refer to Little Bear as “No Scales” in comparison?

But I digress. The point is that this particular snake, found in Southwest China, would not be able to go by the name of No-Feet because—well, look at him, he’s got a frickin’ foot. Not to mention, of course, he’s now dead, which sort of cancels out the point of christening him and welcoming him to the club.

The snake, 16 inches long and about a pinky’s length in width, was taken to the Live Sciences Department at the West Normal University in Nanchang of China for inspection. You have to marvel at the irony there—there’s really not anything normal about this snake. Although, with its claw, it does sort of resemble the Chinese depiction of the dragon. Perhaps…?

And you also have to wonder about Duan Qiongxiu, the 66-year-old woman who found the footed snake in her bedroom (clinging to the wall, mind you, with its claw).

While I would have run screaming from the thing (a snake alone in your bedroom would be freaky—a footed snake would make me think that yep, my family was right, I have been sent to Hell), this elderly woman bashed its head in with her shoe.

Listen to this: “Mrs. Duan said she was so scared she grabbed a shoe and beat the snake to death before preserving it in a bottle of alcohol.”

So we’re saying she beat the thing to death—then had the guts to stick it in a bottle to preserve it?

Either this lady’s got some heavy duty steel-toe foot gear, or she’s got a helluva lot of gumption. Red hat society women, eat your heart out. Sure, you’ll wear a red feather boa—but would you hack at one with your high heels?

Experts say that while two-headed snakes are sometimes found, a snake with a claw is a pretty rare find.